4/18/2023 0 Comments Im fine quotes![]() ![]() “Yes, it does.”Īlthough naming students’ emotions sounds as if it might shut down conversation, it generally has the opposite effect. And then he held my gaze with a well of emotion in his eyes. That must feel so satisfying.” “Yes,” he answered. Instead of answering, “I’m proud of you,” I said, “I know how hard you worked. In my study skills class, I leaned down to talk to a student who shyly shared that he had done well on a test in a class in which he usually struggled. I still remember the first time I used this technique. Instead of telling them I’m proud, I might say, “Wow! That’s so exciting. To support this, I often make a guess about their feelings. Turning your students’ attention to their emotions also helps them more fully inhabit a moment. I also like the way the open-ended phrase gives students control over the details they choose to share. This strategy allows students to relive the moment and magnify their happiness through sharing. Me: “Congratulations! Tell me everything.” Student: “I got my driver’s license yesterday.” Me: “I’m so happy for you! Tell me more.” ![]() Student: “I got a solo in the choir show.” My favorite phrase to help students slow down and savor a particular achievement is a simple “Tell me more.” If I have a talkative student and plenty of time to listen, I might even open with a cheerful, “Tell me everything!” As I experimented with how I responded to their achievements, I discovered four simple strategies. I wanted my students to spend more time basking in their accomplishments and taking ownership for their successes. Second, it shifted attention away from the student and onto me, as if my approval were the goal. First, it tended to end the conversation. Girl, you were too much greatness for him to handle and he was too cowardly to admit it.In the past, when my high school students shared some good news-they’d aced the interview or made the team-I’d answer, beaming, “I’m so proud of you.” I was genuinely happy for them, but something about my response felt off. No one, and I mean absolutely no one, should be making you feel like you are not good enough for them. If you begin to put blame on yourself because of who you are then the relationship wasn’t worth it in the first place. Slowly you will come to see that he had some issues of his own. When taking a step back from the situation, you’ll find a couple of things to be true: Your grieving process will most likely start with lots of crying and some hurtful thoughts that put the blame on you.Īfter you cry a lot, you will start to replay his actions through your head. It’s much more complicated than that, and more than likely has more to do with the guy’s issues than yours. ![]() And while it’s completely valid to have sad thoughts about ourselves, it’s important to know that a breakup is not a result of “not being good enough.” We would all much rather pick ourselves apart and bring ourselves down than admit that we picked a bad apple for a boyfriend. Just not enough.” - Unknown Why will I never be good enough for him? “You are not your mistakes: they are what you did, not who you are.” - Lisa Lieberman-Wang 59. Everybody puts on their pants one leg at a time." - Farrah Gray 58. "Do not let anyone tell you that you are not good enough or smart enough.
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